TESTAMENT  OF A ASPIRANT, TO ONCE BE ALLOWED TO SERVE HIS SPIRITUAL MASTER WITH SPONTANEOUS LOVE by Swami B.A. Paramadvaiti "When we look at the history of Guru-parampara and religion in general, we sadly find that the same symptoms can occur again and again. It is mostly a matter of a few (but unfortunately they are often in leadership positions) who through their behaviour transform the mission from its original character of voluntary enthusiasm into a dictatorial, blind hierarchical system. While the teachings of the old masters are still presented, they are alienated and applied in such a way that people can no longer recognise the pure, clear essence, but become entangled in a network of outward appearances and understandings of form. The most frequent symptoms, which always occur and of which I would like to expressly warn, are arranged in the following points: 1) Materialistic lifestyles, although denied, are justified by the excuse of great holiness. 2) Holy mess...

When a teacher is found to have inappropriate relations with his student, there is a (visible) consequence: he is suspended. Atulananda Maharaja suggests a mild consequence, to take off the picture of Paramadvaiti Maharaja (PM) from the altar “like a symbolic act”. He even suggests that he would take down his own picture as well “until you are restored”. Actually many disciples waited for a “visible” consequence. But nothing happened. Every day the lectures of PM were broadcasted via Gurudeva LIVE to disciples worldwide as though nothing had happened. Watching the broadcast on Gurudeva LIVE, many disciples felt disturbed. (Gurudeva LIVE was deactivated or deleted 3 days ago, for unknown reasons) So in September 2018 Atulananda Maharaja announces to PM that he intends to tell devotees in Brazil, about what happened. PM response: "The way you dissipate it and write it is true. But devastating. I thought you could present it yourself as you did in my letter. Dandavats." It is...

After Saranagati dasi confronted Paramadvaiti Maharaja on phone regarding the allegations from Radha Kunda dasi (while Radha kunda was secretly recording the conversation), Saranagati had an E-mail exchange with him. She urged him: "Your Vrinda family needs your transparency, authenticity, and sincerity at this time. Please write a heartfelt letter to your family." But at some point Paramadvaiti Maharaja stopped to answer and she felt that "that my communication with you is being restricted" (by either Kalki Avatara or Pancha tattva). Until today a "heartfelt letter" was never officialy released. September 2018 Pranams Guru Maharaj, I hope this letter reaches you, as I sense that my communication with you is being restricted. I just finished a five day fast in contemplation and prayer of the current situation. During these days I visited and bathed in a beautiful, ice cold waterfall, I am sure you would love. Guru Maharaj, all the times I have spoke...

Tripurari Maharaja writes regarding Kalki Avataras "nonsense" conspiracy letter which is "a disservice to the Vrinda Mission", Paramadvaiti Maharaja answers via Atulananda Maharaja  October 2018 Tripurari Maharaja What kind of nonsense is this coming from Kalki dasa as an official Vrinda Mission letter? BAP has already admitted to me, yourself, and others that he had illicit relations. This letter of Kalkiʼs is a disservice to the Vrinda Mission. swami Paramadvaiti Maharaja Dear Tripurari Maharaj Dandavats I told you that I went away from the proper conduct. I never had a sexual relationship. And the accusers go so far beyond any reality and made a nasty plan to spread that the devotees felt they need to expose the political manuevering which had taken place. I also felt the letter unessasary the way it came out. But most poeple had no idea what happed in their plan to attack me without neven inquirrering properly. Anyway a big purification for me. Than...

October 2018 Jay Gurudeva, I'm sorry but I didn't like Kalki's letter. It is to reignite the fire, and even quote my children, what does that accomplish? ... Talking about conspiracy is too much. I only accept that there were mistakes, but I will not think badly of Saranagati or Narayani. This becomes like a witch hunt. Uf, a can of such an unnecessary letter. He sent it without consulting anyone and now I do not know how but everyone has it. I apologize for causing this disturbance. Dandavats pranams. BvAA

In our last post we commented, that Paramadvaiti Maharaja refers devotees to Kalki Avatara or Pancha tattva (the main architects of the Radha-Kunda Conspiracy theory) to clear up their doubts. In the following E-mail exchange the same thing happens October 2018 Disciple Dearest Gurudeva! We are pushed by the circumstances to gather the devotees here and speak about the things. After listening to the recording mostly people cannot really take the version we have so far as they directly hear you speak and you also officially say it in the other communication to Gurudeva Atulananda. Paramadvaiti Maharaja ... please talk to pancha tattva about this. I am boarding. Big hug Bap Swami B.A. Paramadvaiti

After the "Open Letter to Paramadvaiti Swami" was published, the following E-mail conversation between Haladhara das and Paramadvaiti Maharaja took place. Notably, Paramadvaiti Maharaja refers Haladhara to Kalki Avatara, to clear up his questions. Kalki Avatara is Paramadvaiti Maharajas secretary in Miami. He was one of the main architects of the Conspiracy theory, which asserted that “envious” Narayan Maharaja disciples used Radha kunda to defame the Acharya of Vrinda (see verdadvrinda.blogspot.com - Spanish page). This is not the only time, Paramadvaiti Maharaja refers devotees to Kalki Avatara or Pancha tattva (the disciple, who manages all E-mail communication for Paramadvaiti Maharaja) to clear up their doubts. A growing number of devotees (many in leading positions) grew frustrated over the unhealthy influence these two personalities have over Paramadvaiti Maharaja. Paramadvaiti Maharaja I suggest you, dear Haladhar, to talk with Kalki avatar personally to bring y...

Haladhara is one of the senior most disciples in Berlin, he accomplished a lot for Vrinda in the past 30 years: He managed Public relations, organised Inter-religious dialoge on a regular basis, he was hosted weekly on German Radio, He translated dozens of Vaishnava songs into german. He recently published a beautiful Bhagavad gita in poetic german language, which was well received by the German Vaishnava community. Haladhara is an independent thinker and outspoken critic. Paramadvaiti Maharaja valued his honest opinion, which sometimes did not sit well with some disciples. October 2018 I have read your former disciple's letter in which she writes about sexual touching on your part and demands that you report it to your disciples and take appropriate action. I have also taken note of various statements you have made about this, in writing or as audio. The conclusion of all these documents is: that you can remember the massage but not the actual accusations. Now I have repe...

Earlier we published Letter Nr. 7, in which Dhamesvari dasi? wrote a letter to Paramadvaiti Maharaja with the title: "Always ahead transcending all battles" (September 2018).   It seems that in October 2018, Dhamesvari became more and more frustrated. She drastically changes her tone and questions him: "Which type of association do you have? Who gives you such terrible advice? I don’t understand why are you so cruel and ruthless with the feelings of those who love you the most?" October 2018 I don't think it's right what you're doing, to abandon the people who have supported you the most and that in times of crisis you turn your back on them. You say that you want to preach to everyone, but that's not what you're demonstrating. At this moment you're lost and only those who are with you know it, but they only provide information at their convenience to their accomplices. But what about the others? You with your attitude demonstrate...

Dhamesvari (who is Dhamesvari?) was obviously aware that there were accusations against Paramadvaiti Maharaja, she chose to remain quiet in hope that things will become like they were in the past. September 2018 Subject: Always ahead transcending all battles Every night I pray a prayer and I ask heaven that you remain the way you are and never change. A prayer of feelings that you inspire me words of love, words of peace As long as you need me. my ears will hear nothing but your voice, all that I am, all that I give you and I hope you need me as much as I do. Though in your soul there is room for a lot of people, save a little corner for me It doesn't matter if it's not the best, that doesn't offend me, as long as I'm with you. I am happy........

In our last letter Nr. 5, in which a disciple, who is managing Paramadvaiti Maharaja's E-mail communication, commented about Paramadvaiti Maharaja’s “very painful and it hurts a lot” letter which “has to be deleted”.   Now we will publish a letter by Atulananda Maharaja, in which he praises this very same letter: “That letter you sent to DM (Damodar Maharaja) is very nice.”   “That letter” unfortunately was deleted upon the request of that disciple in Lima, who was praised on another occasion by Paramadvaiti Maharaja in the following way: “Without …. das, our Vrinda mission would not exist”.   So, Paramadvaiti Maharaja prefers to listen to his disciple, who may have well intentions but not the kind of experience, which would be required in such situations. Why does Paramadvaiti Maharaja ignore the advice by such close associates and learned scholars like Atulananda Maharaja, who is probably the best friend he has? September 2018 Jay GM, sorry to bring you back...

When the first allegations of sexual misconduct surfaced in September 2018, many devotees requested Paramadvaiti Maharaja to release a statement. The following E-mail confirms that indeed he wrote a letter, but for some of his "close" disciples it was obviously too honest. That's why this letter "has to be deleted" because it was "very painful and it hurts a lot". It was replaced with a watered down version, which did not specifically address the accusations. In the end no letter was ever released officially. Paramadvaiti Maharaja was ill advised from the start by a small circle of devotees who control his communication and other aspects of the Vrinda mission. September 2018 Jay Guru Maharaj Dandavats Very nice letter, I confirm receipt The other letter you sent earlier to Damodar Mahraj has to be deleted, can you ask that to maharaj ? It is very painful and it hurts a lot. Thank you Your .... das

Isavasyam das ist a long term friend of Paramadvaiti Maharaja in Germany, they have know each other for many years. August 2019 Dandavats Paramadvaiti All glories to Srila Prabhupada https://theparamadvaitisyndrome.blogspot.com/2019/07/the-acaryas-lover.html What's the matter, Maharaja? Is all this just malicious propaganda or are you the "bad finger" as you are described and is there truth in it? If this is the case, I strongly suggest you to take off your sannyas vesa and confess! Your whole mission is at war with each other and is waiting for an explanation on your part. Are you not in a position to do so? You can't sweep everything under the rug anymore. What else will come to light? Your human side is nothing reprehensible, but with your way of dealing with the revelations of your disciples you discredit yourself in an unbearable way. You can no longer remain silent about the reproaches and continue as if nothing had happened. Are you afraid of losing ...

Summer 2019 Haribol dear Paramadvaiti All glories to Sri Sri Gaura Nitai! Thanks for the audio message we go via Pancatattwa a few weeks ago. We also received the audio messages from you to your German speaking disciples, as well as many other original messages from you to individual disciples who were forwarded to us. We are very concerned about this. With these messages you show much of your inner life. Looking back at the 25 years (in which we were part of the Vrindafamily) we would like to express our deep gratitude to all our God brothers and sisters. Special thanks also to you, for all insights on the search for the eternal bliss, which were given to us thereby. We remember with pleasure the many beautiful encounters at our Easter festivals, the Melas in Hungary and Berlin. These were exciting times that we experienced with our two girls as part of the Vrindafamily. The Vrindafamily became bigger and bigger and took on more and more institutional forms. Unfortunately, ...

October 2018 Sri sri guru gaurangau jayatah! I am writing to you ... regarding the unfortunate behavior of Paramadvaiti Maharaja. "How could this happen?" This is the question some of his disciples are asking me. Well, Rupa Goswami explains that lust can appear in the life even of a bhava bhakta! (1.3.59). There he also states that one should not fault such a bhava bhakta, because he has attained bhava. But later in the text he cites Bilvamangala Thakura as an example of a sadhaka in bhava and further categorizes him as a madhyama bhakta. And we know the story of Bilvamangala. He was a madhyama bhakta in bhava who succumbed to lust, but his response to that is telling and makes it clear that despite this blemish he remained venerable. I think you know the story. My point here is that in reply it is worth noting just how powerful lust is. So there is in one sense nothing to be confused about, if one knows the sastra. If lust can cling to one up to and into bhava ...

October 2018 Dear Maharaj, Thank you for your letter. I will not trouble you too much. I may be your friend, but I know I am not a very close friend. We do not belong to the same sampradaya and so you may find it inappropriate for me to offer advice, especially when it seemed from your letter to me that you were not enthusiastic about getting it. I thought about it, however, and decided that to not say anything would be cowardly and not at all the act of a friend and well-wisher. I have been communicating with Tripurari Maharaj and we seem to be in agreement and so he told me to go ahead and share my thoughts with you. I don't think it is correct or believable that your current difficulties are the result of "politics against you." We had heard rumors before this latest event and I believe that where there is smoke there is fire, especially when there is a lot of it. When there are politics against you, it is not by playing politics that you win, especially...