16. Transcript of an Audio message from Sita d.d. to Pariksit das
In response to Pariksit's audio, Sita d.d. from Ecuador came forward with her own experience. Sita d.d. was sexually assaulted by Paramadvaiti Maharaja in India.
While addressing Paramadvaiti Maharaja directly, Sita's voice turns tearful and broken:
"Please think of the hearts of the people you have touched with your tireless preaching for over 40 years, and who are now confused, hurt, and helpless. Apologize from the heart, amend, since at this time there is no coherence between what you have preached and what is happening."
September 2019
Hare Krishna P. Pariksit.
I wanted to send you my most respectful obeisances for having the courage to make audios about the situation that is being experienced in the Vrinda Mission in relation to Guru Maharaj.
I send you this audio with the only desire to validate your words, without the intention of harming anyone, but with the intention of saying that what you have manifested in the audios regarding the inappropriate behavior that Guru Maharaj has had with some matajis is true.
And why can I affirm this? Because Guru Maharaj has had this kind of behavior with me on several occasions. I was very stunned the first time this happened, it was when we returned in a bus from a parikrama, he sat next to me, I was wearing a poncho and he put his hand under the poncho and rubbed my leg near the groin. I felt guilty, I told myself, how could I have provoked such a reaction in a pure devotee?
In spite of this, the desire to try to serve Krishna through the service of the pure devotee always prevailed in my heart, in the different programs of the mission, such as The Spoon Revolution, House of Wisdom, Vaishnava Academy, in the office, in the temple, etc.
During that time, I was lucky to meet very nice devotees from all over the world, from Colombia, Venezuela, Brazil, Argentina, Chile, Peru, Ecuador, Mexico, United States, Hungary, Germany, from whom I learned many things one way or another. And in a short time they became my soul family. But of course, as in all families, there were obviously discrepancies, not because of malice, but with the sole and sincere desire that we could all do a service that made Guru Maharaj proud.
In the end, weren't we all trying to serve Sri Radha Krishna? Wasn't it our duty to offer the best of us so that in the world there would be more Krishna consciousness? For the mission to grow, for Guru Maharaj's ideals to protect Mother Earth, to promote vegetarianism, to clean Vrindavan, to make Oida Therapy known, etc. expand more and more all over the world?
But there was a parallel situation that did not give me peace,. I was once told that the relationship we have with the guru is the relationship we have with Krishna, which could be of a brother/sister, friend, father/mother, or a relationship of a wife; so, I wondered, is my relationship with the guru that of a wife? And if so, is this type of behavior of the guru allowed with his disciples? I really had no one to ask because I would look like someone who offends the pure devotee.
Well, and it happened also that on two occasions Gurudeva tried to kiss me, once when I privately complained to him, that why he protected so many devotees that have caused much harm to other devotees within the mission. He approached me and tried to kiss me, I walked away and I left the room right away.
When I had the mercy of traveling to India, the first thing Gurudeva told us when we arrived was that in Vrindavan everything good we do is magnified, becoming good karma and that everything bad we do is also magnified, becoming bad karma, those words stayed with me, and I tried throughout my stay to control my mind so nothing would disturb me. On that occasion, Guru Maharaj had asked me to help him with a Powerpoint presentation and at the time of reviewing, I sat next to him and he turned around and tried to kiss me. I got red, started sweating, but I kept showing him the presentation and what he had told us about karma came to mind again.
I make this statement in solidarity with my spiritual sisters, with Radha Kunda, with Prisni, whom I know personally, and in solidarity with the other matajis who have lived similar experiences, and who for fear of being branded crazy or of being threatened, they do not have the courage to be transparent about these uncomfortable situations that they have lived with Guru Maharaj. I am sure that the matajis who had the courage to denounce him did not lie or exaggerate. I am very sorry that they have been persecuted by their fanatical spiritual brothers and sisters, who tried to make them look crazy and have threatened them to the point of wanting them to retract, perhaps solely for their personal interests, for the implications that this may have on their preaching or personal businesses related to the mission.
How is it possible that they told a mother not to mention anything, that it is a "blessing" to be "touched" by the guru? This is inconceivable.
Guru Maharj, I beg you, on behalf of all those who have served you selflessly from the heart, to please reconsider your position, listen to your well-wishers, who are not necessarily those who want to force you to stay in the mission. I ask you for total transparency. Please think of the hearts of the people you have touched with your tireless preaching for over 40 years, and who are now confused, hurt, and helpless. Apologize from the heart, amend, since at this time there is no coherence between what you have preached and what is happening. It is not my desire to condemn you, we are human, we make mistakes, but in your position as a guru you cannot please your senses that way with matajis after taking vows of celibacy. Please make the right decision, not only for your disciples, but for you, and for the impact all this has on the lives of thousands of people.
Devotees, my obeisances. I just wanted to share my personal experience regarding Guru Maharaj and the Vrinda family.
Dandavats everyone and forgive my past, present or future offenses.
Editors note:
1. Link to Pariksit's audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V31rTccUS4s
A devotee is currently translating the audio, we will publish it here in the coming days.
2. Sexual assault is a crime. It includes unwanted touching, kissing, grabbing and rape.
3. Some victims already reported the sexual assault to the German Embassy in the U.S. and some South American countries.
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